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By Andrea Peyser
December 14, 2015
Ho FREAKIN’ ho.
Merry multicultural and atheist-friendly festivals, America. The War on Christmas, an annual skirmish that leftists insist is a figment of conservative imaginations, continues with the sinking of lumps of coal down environmentally ruinous chimneys.
Starbucks, move over. The java-giant overlords, who this season scratched pictures of religiously threatening holly, stars and even snowflakes from cups in favor of joyless red ones, have got nothing on the latest battle, which I call “How the Grinch Stole Macy’s.”
A bad Santa — actually a phony fat man wearing a red suit and false beard — is trashing Christmas spirit by targeting tourists and shoppers in the heart of New York City with aggressive panhandling.
After posing for pictures with squealing fans outside the Macy’s flagship store in Herald Square, the pretend St. Nicholas forces kids to learn the hard way that Santa might not be real. He demands $5 “donations” or “tips” from bewildered parents and frightened children, apparently unaware that they may sit on a better Santa’s lap inside Macy’s, free of charge.
“I’m following all the laws. I’m a street performer,” like the costumed cretins ruining Times Square, said the ersatz Kris Kringle, who identified himself to The Post as 35-year-old Bruce Clark of Bushwick, Brooklyn.
Cops seemed to be at a loss as to how to kick the latter-day Ebenezer Scrooge’s behind, before finally asking him to scram, along with another faux St. Nick. They’ll be back.
I reached out to Bob Elkin, president and CEO of the International Brotherhood of Real Bearded Santas. Multiethnic members of Elkin’s organization of 1,200 Santa impersonators are required to maintain natural facial hair. (Sorry, femi-Santas)
“This guy belongs on my ‘naughty’ list,’’ said Elkin, 74, of Tampa, Fla.
The War on Christmas is showing no signs of letting up.
Santa Claus was banned last month from PS 169 in Sunset Park, Brooklyn, by new principal Eujin Jaela Kim, as were kids’ recitations of the Pledge of Allegiance. Thanksgiving celebrations were replaced at the school with a “harvest festival,” and Christmas parties with “winter celebrations.”
“No angels. We can’t even have a star because it can represent a religious system, like the Star of David,” PTA President Mimi Ferrer was warned by school administrators, she told The Post’s Susan Edelman.
Vagrants temporarily forced the cancellation of a Christmas-tree-lighting ceremony held annually in a playground in The Bronx’s Little Italy section. Sponsors spent so much money on security, shielding visitors from public urinators and aggressive beggars, there was no cash left for the celebration. After police cleared the homeless out of the park, the event was back on.
At the University of Tennessee, Knoxville, the Office of Diversity and Inclusion (this exists) recently posted on the publicly funded school’s Web site “Best Practices for Inclusive Holiday Celebrations” — to help campus employees “ensure your holiday party is not a Christmas party in disguise.”
Revelers were instructed to send nondenominational holiday cards, put up decorations in neutral colors and make sure that all foods and beverages served at gatherings are not specific to any particular culture or religion.
“Holiday parties and celebrations should not play games with religious and cultural themes — for example, ‘Dreidel’ or ‘Secret Santa,’ ’’ the Office of Diversity and Buzzkill scolded.
After Republican state lawmakers demanded the resignation of the university’s chancellor and sought to pull funding from the diversity office, a “clarification” was posted online in place of the directive. “We are in no way trying to dismiss this very important Christian holiday,” it read. “As a diverse campus, we do promote ways to be inclusive of all cultures and religions.”
Who’s afraid of mistletoe and Christmas trees, of elves, eggnog, jingle bells, reindeer and Santa’s sleigh?
Apparently, bums and lily-livered campus eggheads (or is that redundant?) and corporate weenies terrified of offending anyone. Hey, geniuses, this Jew is pissed off by your attempts to destroy the Dec. 25 holiday honoring the birth of Jesus Christ!
“Christmas is about love and hope and joy and happiness and collecting smiles,” said Santa Bob.
Freakin’ ho-nos are trying hard to wreck the season. Fortunately, the spirit won’t be snuffed out.
Merry Christmas! Happy Hanukkah! Joyous Kwanzaa!