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By Andrea Peyser
June 22, 2015

Why we need a President Trump

The Donald is The Man.

In the midst of hopscotching between his sumptuous New York City residence and Iowa cow country aboard his private Boeing 757 jet, amid blow-drying his glorious corn-colored locks and deigning to shake hands with the hicks in New Hampshire, Donald Trump, cheerleader for an America that transformed an egomaniacal germophobe from Queens (like me — the Queens part) into a billionaire, TV star and superstud, stopped moving long enough to take my phone calls.

“You are a special person. I can’t tell that to too many people — they won’t believe me,’’ Trump, 69, sucked up to me before turning the conversation to the person he loves best.

That would be Donald J. Trump, real-estate tycoon, star of the reality TV show “Celebrity Apprentice’’ (NBC honchos plan to put its production on hold) and, believe it, candidate for the 2016 Republican presidential nomination.

But what about me?

“I am leaving right now for Iowa,’’ Trump motormouthed last week like a Hoover vacuum cleaner on methamphetamines. “I’m not going to cut you off. I don’t have the courage to.’’ That’s more like it.

Trump played with my head, like a kitten with string, in 2013, when the man whose famous TV catchphrase is the unmerciful “You’re fired!’’ prepared to run for New York state governor by shlepping to the state capital of Albany, a place in which the greatest cultural activity is government corruption. He didn’t run.

In 2011, I tooled around Portsmouth, NH, with Trump in a black stretch limo that was too long and too fabulous to park anywhere in town, as he made a move on the White House.

Um — never mind.

He’s been threatening to run for president since the 1980s, when his comb-over hairdo was in style and he was married to his first wife, Czech-born Ivana, who attached the “The’’ to his first name.

Then this past Tuesday, Trump did it. He announced in his glitzy Manhattan Trump Tower headquarters that he planned to snatch the 2016 Republican nomination for the White House from the weenies now lining up for it.

“I will be the greatest jobs president that God ever created,’’ he cried, also vowing to kick ISIS terrorists’ butts.

Hey — this country could do worse. It already has. Here are six reasons why Trump’s got my vote:

Vice President Oprah would be awesome

Trump said he “jokingly’’ told George Stephanopoulos on ABC News that his dream ticket would feature media mogul Oprah Winfrey, 61, as his running mate, an idea he floated when he considered running for president in 1999.

“So Oprah’s a friend of mine. I’ve been on her TV show. She’s terrific. She’s a Democrat and she’s a liberal but that’s OK. It doesn’t make someone a bad person.’’
Still, no response from Oprah.

He likes everybody

“I like people. I know everybody. I get along with everybody, but I do the best job,’’ said Trump. “I think [Republican presidential frontrunner] Jeb Bush is a nice person, I don’t know him. He’s weak on immigration. I like Hillary [Rodham Clinton, the Democratic front-runner]. She’s like me. Her politics, not so much.”

President Obama is “a loser,’’ but Trump said he’d invite him to play on one of his golf courses. “I own the best courses in the world.’’

He’d be senior to the oldest president — but doesn’t act like it

At age 69, Trump would be senior to the oldest president Ronald Reagan if elected.

He’s also older than Hillary Clinton, who’s 67.

About that Mexico thing…

“When Mexico sends its people, they’re not sending their best,’’ Trump said in his campaign launch speech. “They’re bringing drugs, they’re bringing crime. They’re rapists.” Holy cow!

He told me, “I love Mexico and the Mexican people. What I said is, Mexico as a country has totally out-negotiated the United States in terms of trade. Many people coming to the country from the southern border, not necessarily Mexicans, are not people you want. They’re criminals. Some of those people are people Mexico doesn’t want and we don’t want.’’

Thanks for clearing that up.

“I’m really rich.”

Trump pegs his net worth at $8,737,540,000. Forbes magazine asserts that he’s worth $4.1 billion. He said, “They don’t know, I’m a private person.’’

Suffice it to say, he’ll pay for his campaign out of his own pockets without relying on early-bird specials and contributions from special-interest groups.

He answers to no one. Except me?

“Tell my wife I’ll call her back,’’ Trump bellowed to an assistant as a phone call came in from his third and current wife, Slovenia-born ex-model Melania, 45.

“She can wait for you,’’ he told me.

Elect President Trump!

Is there someone better? I don’t think so.